i watched oldboy the other night, its going to be bastardized soon too...  

our empire is falling and we have run out of ideas?


i say, real lions eating real christians. id watch that.

edited: 30 Nov 2005   

celebrity death matches with audience participation.  

I vote for "Breast Feeding LIVE Reality TV"  

I took a very good movie writing course once from a guy who sold a lot of MOVIE-OF-THE-WEEKs . He said that you had less than 15 seconds to pitch a movie. It is certainly harder to explain an original but derivative movie concept in 15 seconds. Like explain the Theremin Movie or The Moog Movie or Being John Malkovich in 15 seconds or less.


That's when I came up with Movie Pitching Haiku
Haiku are 17 syllables and movie pitching is 15 seconds

For instance pitching a Sequel

Pretty Woman Gets
hooked on Crack and dies alone
a Reverse Rocky

Or how about something a little like the penguin movie this last summer

Underwater Whales
Jacques Cousteau Goes Triple – X
Call it “Freed Willy”


But some films like the remakes are pretty hard to write a decent poem about. I guess I’d sell the Peter Jackson Remake as some sort of

First was stop motion
Then Color Dolby-phonic
Now CGI Kong!!

I do have a love for very bad movies but the 1976 King Kong is such a piece of shit even a bad movie lover won’t crap on without a rented anus. For this movie I have written a few bad movie haiku.


Must choose between Jeff
Daniels and Kong? Take the ape!
it's less hair that way.

All of my lifetime
I've sought this place time forgot
Why Grodin still gets work.  

best post evar.  

Damn RISDI kids.  

aint nobody like that here....  

nooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!

maybe they'll leave 'bad guy' alone?  

I think movie companies don't want to take risks, like making a futuristic japanese porn movie called I.K.U., so they go with the "tried and true" remake. Less risk. It's all capitalizm & marketing at work.  

OK, so what is rong with the movie watching population?
it's thier $$$ that support this. if no one watched it, they would stop making it. that is how capitalism works

but, ppl keep watching and buying tix (and renting DVDs)  

we've come to expect less in general. why dont you just go smoke some dope. and forget about it..  

i wanna make a new Predator film.
set in glasgow, where the predator becomes stranded after crashing his spaceship and then becomes hounded by drunken youths carrying knives.
like a role reversal thing.
i think this would make a great film.

yeah but most other remakes/franchise movies are very bad though.  

lol -- because the industry is run by a bunch o executives insted of artists?
because exec's arnt creative and woud rather make a little bit of easy money than alot of risky money on an artists idea? same ole same ole? :P  

sean sheee wins by a mile